Good point well made

At the recent national sexual health conference, the topic of rape came up. After many long winded questions to the panel from academics and professionals, a teenage girl stood up and made the most memorable point of the day.

Why she asked, are we as women always made to feel responsible for rape and sexual assault? ‘’Look at all these ads - its like ‘girls, watch your drink at all times to avoid getting spiked’ and ‘girls, don’t get in any taxi cab unless you know for sure it is licensed’. ‘Girls, don’t walk home in unlit areas late at night and don’t listen to your ipod when walking alone’’. ‘‘When’’ she demanded, voice rising ‘’are they going to bring out an ad campaign that says ‘men - stop raping women!’’

Good point well made I think.

On the same topic, I was so confused and frustrated reading the reporting of Jack Tweed’s rape case yesterday. Tweed is being tried for ‘rape’ while his friend Anthony Davis is being tried for ‘oral rape’ (and we dont know yet whether they are guilty or not). The story is that Tweed raped her and Anthony forced her to perform oral sex. I am confused. Is this somehow not as bad as penetrative rape? Does so called ‘oral rape’ carry a lesser sentence? Is someone actually saying that it’s not quite as bad if they get raped in the mouth?

To the same degree, the media’s insistence on using the term ‘date rape’ shows no sign of abating. There is somehow this belief that being raped by a known man is not as traumatic as being raped by a stranger. In fact rape by your husband was only criminalised as recently as 1991! Considering over 80% of rape victims know their assailant, I think we can safely say that ‘date rape’ is simply ‘rape’.

I think it’s high time we started calling a spade a spade.